


Last but not alone

by pairatime



Category: Space: Above and Beyond
Genre: Family, Gen, Grief/Mourning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-09
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-04-13 17:57:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4531557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pairatime/pseuds/pairatime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of the peace talks Hawkes and West have to deal with living.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Last but not alone

**Author's Note:**

> Smallfandomfest: Space Above and Beyond: Hawkes & or / West, "we're the only ones
> 
> I hope you guys like this, This is my first Space Above and Beyond but I don’t think it’ll be my last but read and enjoy

“They found their bodies so its official we’re the only ones left,” Nathan said in a low voice as he entered the 58th’s bunks, his eyes looking from one empty bunk to the next until his gaze rested on Cooper.

Cooper was curled up on his bunk, his head resting on his knees as he stared at a group shot of them all, taken a month or so back, “Is this what it felt like when your brother died? When you lost your family?”

“Yeah Coop, this is what it feels like,” Nathan answered as he dropped onto the bunk next to Cooper, looking at the photo in the In-Vitroes hands, “The services are being held tomorrow at ten hundred hours.”

“McQueen should have been able to be there, they should wait,” Cooper said as he leaned against his fellow Lieutenant, resting his head on his shoulder.

“The Colonel isn’t coming back Coop. It’s just us,” Nathan said back as he reached out with one hand and ran a finger over Vansen’s image as his other hand came around Cooper’s shoulder, “all we have is each other.”

Cooper wasn’t sure when he fell asleep; he hadn’t even realized he had until he woke up at the sound of a private entering their quarters, breaking the quiet and relative calm. Cooper only opened his eyes enough to see the private standing before them, “What do you want private?” he demanded without lifting his head from Nathan’s shoulder.

“Sir, the Commodore has requested that both you and Lieutenant West report to his office by 930 hours, before the service this morning Sirs,” the Private answered.

“What time is it now private,” Cooper requested of the private as he sat up causing Nathan’s arm to drop and the man to groan as he started waking.

“8:05 Sir.”

“What? What happened to reveille, private?” Nathan demanded as he opened his own eyes and sat up quickly.

“The Commodore ordered it not sounded in this barracks. Sir.”

“Why’d he do that? Now we’re late for the morning briefing,” Cooper said as he stood up.

“We’re not on duty today, are we?” Nathan asked as he slumped back, “Never mind. Tell the Commodore we’ll be there.”

“Yes Sir,” the private said before he quickly departed.

“What do you think the Commodore wants?” Cooper asked as he started stripping off his uniform from the day before.

“I don’t know, a message from the Colonel, some award from the 58th, telling us he’s sorry for our loss again…” Nathan speculated out loud as he also started removing his uniform, “Probably why he cancelled our normal wake up call.”

“I hope it’s a message from the Colonel, we haven’t heard much since they shipped him back to Earth,” Cooper added as he grabbed his supplies to hit the shower.

“Yeah that would be good,” Nathan said as he ready to do the same.

***

The two men presented themselves to the Commodore, both dressed in their best dress uniforms. It was the first time they had done so since Wong and the others had died.

“Reporting as ordered Sir,” Nathan said as he and Cooper snapped to attention.

“At ease Marines,” the Commodore ordered as he looked at the two men, “Gentlemen, as the remaining members of the 58th I’d like you both to speak at the service later today if you’re willing.”

“Can we? That, I’d like that,” Cooper said as he glanced over at Nathan before looking back at the Commodore.

“Yes Sir we appreciate the opportunity,” Nathan added meeting Cooper’s eyes for a second before he also returned to look at the Commodore.

“Good, after the service you two have two hours to pack up your gear. You’ve both been ordered back to Earth, to leave with all due haste. You’ve been transferred to a new training school they’re started, after a ten day’s leave,” the Commodore informed them, talking over them when they tried to interrupted him at his surprise announcement.

“Why are we being sent back?” Cooper asked.

“Sir, we’re pilots why are we being taken out of the fight,” Nathan demanded as he stepped forward.

“Lieutenant, this order comes’ from the top and if you think for a moment I think you’ll realize why they are recalling you both to Earth. Now you have 25 minutes to think about that you want to say.”

“Yes Sir.”

“Yes Commodore.”

***

“And now from some final words, Lieutenant Hawkes and Lieutenant West,” the Commodore said as he stepped aside from the podium and let Nathan and Cooper walk up to stand before the assembled man and women.

“I never had a family. I was always on my own, until I met them. They became my family. Losing Pags on Mars was the first time I cared that someone died. A couple months ago when Vansen got me a Christmas gift… it was my first gift,” Cooper told the crowed as he looked over at the three caskets, “They are my family, and now they’re gone,” his voice breaking as he reached out and grabbed Nathan.

“We lost them, but they will never be forgotten,” Nathan spoke as he stepped closed to Cooper, “the Wild Cards will never give up, for them we’ll never give up. I just hope we’re able to return soon,” Nathan finished as he brought up a salute, “Good bye guys,” he said as Cooper joined him with his own salute.

***

“Isn’t this kind of fast?” Cooper asked as he looked out the port window at the Saratoga which was getting smaller and smaller as the transport they were on got farther and farther from the carrier.

“It seems like the same speed as always,” Nathan said as he looked over from his temporary bunk toward Cooper’s.

“Not the ship, but the transfer, everything,” Cooper explained as he rolled onto his back.

“It’s all about PR, Coop.”

“Huh,” Cooper said as he turned toward Nathan confused.

“We’re the 58th, heroes of the belt, the Wild Cards, one of the most decorated squads of this war. They don’t want to lose the last of us, it would hurt moral,” Nathan told the In-Vitroes as he turned to stare at the ceiling.

“Is that why we have leave?” Cooper asked.

“Yeah, they probably need the time to figure out what to do about us, until then what do you plan on doing with your ten days?” Nathan asked.

“I-I don’t know, hadn’t thought about it, what about you? Any plans?”

“Yeah, I plan on seeing my family. I haven’t seen them since Neil… I haven’t even been able to talk to them. I don’t even have a reply to my letter yet,” Nathan said as he punched the ship’s wall in frustration.

“Do they know you’re coming?” Cooper asked as he looked over at Nathan.

“I don’t know. I didn’t have any time to even try and call them before we left the Saratoga. I hope they know,” Nathan explained as he sat up ad looked over at the other man, “will you come with me?”

“What? You mean to see your family? I’m not sure,” Cooper answered as he turned toward Nathan.

“I don’t know if I can deal with it alone. The last time I had Shane, and Neil was alive, we-,“ Nathan broke off as he just stared at the metal floor between his feet.

Cooper moved from his rack to Nathan’s before he’d even thought about it, he didn’t start thinking about it until he was holding Nathan against his chest and Nathan grabbed onto him, “it-ah-I-it’ll be all right,” Cooper said looking down at Nathan then looking around at the empty compartment of the ship, “we’ll make it.”

***

“Thanks for coming Coop,” Nathan told the other man as he closed the door of rental car once they reached his parents driveway.

“I’ve never really seen a family together, is it okay that I’m here? I don’t want to impose,” Cooper said nervously as he exited from the other side of the car.

“Coop, its’ fine…I can do this, I can,” Nathan repeated to himself as he stood and stared at the door to his family home.

Cooper listened to Nathan’s low muttering as he made his way around the car to stand by Nathan’s shoulder, “we can do this.”

Nathan took a deep breath and squeezed Coopers hand before he squared his shoulders and started walking toward the front door and called out when he reached and opened the door, “Mom, Dad?” he called before turning to look at Cooper and stepping into the house waving for the other man to follow.

Cooper looked around the spacious home as he followed Nathan after wiping his feet on the welcome mat just like that one at the training Center said to do.

The two men walked into the large living room, Nathan slowly walked up to the mantel and the myriad of photos around it. It was a mix of family shots, shots of Neil both in and out of uniform and even some photos of himself, from when he was growing up, when he had enlisted, even a few that Nathan had sent home over the last year.

Cooper walked up behind Nathan and reached for the one that was in the center of the mantel, a group photo of the 58th from one of the awards they’ve gotten, the photo even had McQueen standing with them all, “I miss them.”

“So do I Coop, so do I.”

***

At first Nathan didn’t know what woke him but them he saw Cooper standing in the doorway, “Hawkes, what are you doing it’s,” Nathan started before looking at the near by clock, “one in the morning.”

“I, it’s just…I’ve never really slept alone before, I’ve always been in a room with others,” Cooper said as he fidgeted at the doorway, “I can’t sleep.”

“You’ve never had your own room? You’ve 20,” Nathan said as he pushed himself up to look at Cooper.

“The 58th, the Training Center both had bunks, I wasn’t alone, even on the streets between… can I… I mean can…”

“Yeah Coop,” Nathan answered as he dropped his hand back onto the pillow and shut his eyes.

He opened again a moment later when he heard something flop on the floor to see Cooper drop a pillow on the floor next to the bed, “You’re not sleeping on the floor.”

“It’s fine, it’s better then a lot of other places.”

“Hawkes…you’re not sleeping on the floor. This bed’s a double, big enough for the both of us,” Nathan said as he slid over to make room.

“You don’t have to do that Wes.”

“Looking Coop it’s not like we haven’t slept together before and this bed is much better then a bunch of rocks on some random world. So get over here before I change my mind.”

“Okay,” Was all Cooper said as he climbed into the bed and pulled up the covers then closed his eyes and just listened to Nathan breath.


End file.
